The Inbox: The Lovers and the Mad

The usual worries are there: where's this one going and how will it get there? It could be a post about all the thank yous I need to give or It could be a post about how grateful I am for it all. Those things are fine, but you can spend way too much time thanking people and not enough doing actual shit.

Last week, one of the blog's readers found her way into my inbox. I love it when this happens. I'm not the best at replying comments, but I'm working on that. You took the effort to read something that I wrote, so a comment back should be the least I do in return.

This is the email I got sent.

Subject: It's serious.

When I saw that I was happy because to extract some level of seriousness from me, there's got to be money involved. If not, all you'll get is the I'll get to it when I've got an inspired minute Afam, not the by hook or by crook this infernal thing has got to be done Afam. 

I ran across your blog and I Am helplessly and hopelessly in love, I would love for us to be friends : )..I hope that didn't come out stalker crazy I think your lots of fun and I want to be friends.

Friends come in all shapes and sizes, and through avenues that you can't possibly predict, so why not? And I deal in crazy and madness! It's all aboard here. I mean that. All aboard! Ramblings for you, ramblings for me, ramblings for everybody! The next comment is a nice one too...

Wow. I just read the first post you wrote and you have an amazing way with words. Like anon above me simply put it "Oh the places you'll go!" Fyi - new famzer alert.

Comments like the one above make me blush! I wrote my first post 3 years and a bit ago! It's great to see that people still enjoy the day one stuff. The next comment I've going to talk about isn't as nice as the first two, but I don't mind it either. I mean, haters are everywhere, and this one came from someone who's obviously interested in discrediting me. The only down to it is that it's lazy. If you're going to discredit me, do it well. Don't challenge the facts, challenge the half formed opinions in a rational way, and then let's have it out in the comments section. I encourage discussions that make us think. I grow from your honesty. But this guy messed with the wrong ship.

I do hereby discredit this article and its author, who just want to gain cheap publicity by publishing untrue fact of a prestigious event.
The ceremony in question {call to bar 2013 I was a celebrant i: e I was called to bar on that same day,} which made me very familiar with events that occurred on the said date.

That was also the same day when President Goodluck Johnathan’s daughter was called to bar and our first lady was in attendance.

If you were aware counsel of legal education in conjunction with Body of benchers called to bar about 5025 lawyers to bar for a period of two days splitting the numbers in two, each day had morning and afternoon session in other to accommodate everyone and avoid people been stamped on the occasion.

Like every other events in Nigeria it attracted business to the local resident and there were lots of other joyful celebration going on outside the premises.
Allow me to state categorically here that the events its self was highly manned by heavily trained security personal, law and order was adhered to at all times visitors and celebrant maintained an oddly manner throughout the event.

As part of our rich legal heritage and judicial culture Non-lawyers were escorted out of the premises to allow the law dinner ritual to commence, which resulted to so many anxious and excited parents to wait longer than they expected. People then were congregating within the premises and sharing their joyful moment with whom so ever that wishes to listen to them.
It was not as a result of negligence on the counsel of legal education or FCT to provide conducive environment, which they did. Traffic management of FCT warned drivers to avoid the route to ICC Abuja during this period and also provided alternative parking arena for drivers wishing to drive to the ceremony,

The only traffic queue that occurred is only when drivers are dropping off or picking up celebrant and their families form ICC, which was a traffic delay of approximately 10 to 15 minutes as was expect for high profile national ceremony.

My main reason to reply to your article is to prevent the hate message most of our people do preach against our country Nigeria. We have treated our country with no iota of respect and dignity.
We need to start believing in this great country Nigeria . Be positive and patriotic to Nigeria

Henry ibekwem [esq]

Fair enough, but unfortunately for him I was there. The blog was about my experience there that day. He claims that I was publicity mad, and that I caved in to my base instinct for relevance by resorting to libel. That's a really strong claim! The day was chaos. It was a struggle to get in, and ten to fifteen minutes of traffic isn't enough to make any Nigerian worth his or her salt walk. We're subjected to much worse daily. He's obviously in someone's pocket. 

This may be self indulgent but why me? Why can't people like him leave me alone? I mean, I took pictures! The article didn't come from my imagination. Every allegation in there had at least two verifiable, trustworthy sources. I would go so far as to say that I wish it wasn't me that had to write it. I wish that I could have focused on the joy that the day brought my family and I, but there was really no joy to be had! How can you be happy when you're worrying about the safety of your fifty something year old mother who's only 5 foot nothing? 

The worst thing about it is that for all the time spent in training, any law report written by him would make even a primary school child cringe. It's an Ugh and a half. In spite of how disappointed I am in the whole affair, I'll issue a challenge. Henry, if the ceremony is any different from how I say it is, then have the counsel of legal education call me back to blog about it. Of course this doesn't change the fact that I'll never forget that day in 2013 on account of how distressing the day was, but it'll say that they Counsel is getting better at planning these things. 

Lastly, I don't hate Nigeria, I only hate that it's failed me so many times. I won't sing a song of happiness and glee about it because that won't do anybody any good. I won't say, "There's a school in Lagos with a bus route that passes through it, but be glad! Be glad, because the children are getting an education!" I won't say, "The Chibok girls have been gone for a year, but thank the heavens for our large population! Boko Haram can kidnap and torture and displace as many as they like because we've got the numbers to withstand them." You call it spreading a message of hate, but I call it love. I love us so much that I won't lie about us. Spinning a tale of woe does nought but create an imaginary land of rainbows and dreams, which collapses when you realise that rainbows and dreams are fickle things that don't do anything practical for anybody. 

Happy Days,


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